CHARLAS EN EL VATICANO. Por Edgardo Arrivillaga.

Publicado en 10/18,2016


Reunión de la cúpula de asesores de Bergoglio.
Vera: este Papa nos va a matar a todos. Es incapaz de gozar de la vida, y ahora que se compró esos anteojitos en Trastevere no se le escapa nada.
Moreno: es que vos no entendés nada. Este es un Papa antihedonista. Está contra la globalización, aunque no lo dice, y nos va a llevar a todos juntos hasta la victoria. Ayer hable con Cristina que sigue coleccionando diplomas honoris causa y me intimó secamente que hay que apoyarlo.
Marta Cascales de Moreno: es un hombre que ha tenido una vida dura, le falta un pulmón y necesita un poco de cariño femenino.
(Mientras habla, la mujer de Moreno se pinta las uñas y dice): chicos, qué más podemos hacer para ayudarlo?
Vera (mientras se sirve un whisky): algo tenemos que pensar porque otro como éste no lo encontramos más.
(Reaparece la mujer de Moreno): le voy a cantar un tango.
(Todos la miran): ¿tango? ¿Y qué clase de tango?
Cascales de Moreno: Adiós pampa mía. Desde luego, imitando al inolvidable Hugo.
Vera (dirigiéndose a Moreno): ¿y como te va con Milani y las pancherías?
Moreno: el general seductor pescó la onda… las pancherías serán un éxito, aunque hay algún oficialito de Remonta y Veterinaria que se queja.
Vera (sorbiendo otro poco de whisky): ¿y de qué se queja?
Moreno: bueno, vos sabés cómo es eso. Siempre hay algún pelotudo que no le cuadra la carne.
Vera: mientras no pida protección de la Gendarmería vamos bien. Además, ya desmontamos la base de la calle Estados Unidos. Pero estoy apuntando a algo mas grande…
Cascales de Moreno: ¿a que?
Vera: a quedarnos con Castel Gandolfo. Podemos hacer un excelente acuerdo turístico con los chinos y empaquetarlos a todos por via de las necesidades sociales insastifechas.
Moreno: eso es brillante, pero hay un problema. El concordato que firmoBenito con el Vaticano y los Pactos Lateralenses…
Vera (rascándose la caspa que le cae del pelo anaranjado): Jorge no sabe nada de estas cosas. Hay que mantenerlo alejado de Sanchez Sorondo y de la Curia retrograda que no entiende muy bien lo que es nacional y popular. Ese es trabajo para vos, contador. ¿No es que tenes un pergamino de la UADE?
Moreno: es cierto y algún otro pergamino mas. Pero el asunto es convencerlo.
Vera (sirviéndose otro vaso de Smuggler): eso déjamelo a mi. Yo soy hombre de apretar. Al cura lo vamos a empapelar de pagares a favor de los humildes y todo estará bien y todos contentos. Me preocupa la Guardia di Finanza, aunque ahí te tenemos a vos –y señala a Moreno_. Y de esos temas vos si que entendes.
(Todos sonríen y Vera exclama): lo engrampamos al curita. Te dije que este iba a ser nuestro mejor negocio. Bueno, ahora vamos a dar una vuelta por ahí.
Moreno: a propósito, le acabo de comprar una buena edición de El anti Maquiavelo.
Vera: ¿y donde la conseguiste?
Moreno: en mesa de saldos, querido, y compre 20 asi me hicieron descuento…
Telon.


Comentarios

  1. 10/18,2016 | 14:51

    Estimado:

    Falta (entre otros) Pino Solamas

  2. 10/18,2016 | 15:57

    Estimado. Se me escapó. Saludos, EA.

  3. 10/18,2016 | 16:01

    Estimado Parcass. Se me escapó. Saludos, EA.

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